Gasp for air, girl...
Between your sniffle
Lower your voice as you sob.
Just keep typing those fonts
She'll keep a secret afterall
Typing 'LOL', as you bawl,
Play that song on repeat
Let 'em flow without lid.
Taste 'em as much as you get,
on the corner of your lips
The saltiness of life, a play of fate.
It's gonna tug,
the strings of your heart
Hold on to whatever,
blanket or sofa corner
And, get ready at my mark.
"I hope you don't mind,
That I dream of you sometimes...
Along with my guilt...
between the sheets..."
"The sheets that are damp from traces,
of regrets, passion and tears.
Unspoken verses of emotion and fears.
Fears of falling, no longer able of hiding...
From unconditional fate,
that's slowly seeping..."
The silent desolation
not even from the torment
of being broken
But simply, agony to be separated
Peeling off my layers of soul
that recognize yours
Unfortunately no one could choose
When, where nor whose
to encounter that one person
To quiver to the whole existence
I would not have a heart to give you hard times.
Remembering how you've been kind.
no matter how I am tempted
to entertain the curiosity you've had in mind.
I reminded my self, over and over again
that you were genuinely leading my hand
the courage you gather to safe me
being objective, seeing my worth more than anybody
How could I leave you alone,
suffering. thinking you deserve it
How could I let you be,
after all the things you've done for me.
in my confusion of blaming
for your resurrecting of this feeling
the instinct kicked in
I hold you high and precious within.
And that was the only answer I need to hear.
To give me certainty this is not the end,
That I will get to see you again,
every now and then.
You see, I've got 'forever' in mind
Trotting carefully to keep the one.
Close and closer, breaking 'em walls
Until it's all safe to confess the whole.
You see, I want his heart or nothin' at all.
I want his warmth behind closed doors.
I will be patient to link 'em lines
To know him better, soul and mind.
While being sincere, and genuine.
As he'll sense it if I am pretending.
He reads me that well, I oughta be true...
Coz you're the one I don't wanna loose.
I tried to hold it inside
But all hell broke loose
As you said,
you're leaving in March.
I cried four days and nights
Emotions pulled my heart strings so hard
As if they were gonna fall apart...
I could not function,
As my brain has been compromised
They thought of you only,
From the first light, until dusk
You see,
This feeling has no way out
And that hurts enough
You see,
I have no other choice
Other than to let it engulf
The only thing I can do
Or I will regret it all of my life
If I'd continue survive,
without knowing you...
These words and scenes being replayed
in her mourning.
These words he stated
perhaps hurt her more than him.
words that were supposed to be sad
yet he uttered 'em in regular tone like that
sounded so excruciating,
while she's there, ready to give him everything
her heart strings were pulled too hard
If it is not yet ripped apart.
Few days straight, tears overflown
unknowing the source of her emotion
Dysfunctional without a clue
which direction to move
She thought,
she was ready to hear about anything
yet, she was lost in the sudden piercing
Her heart explode, All bets are off
As he said....
I have thought of the impossible scenarios in my head
and dreamt of how I would plan to react.
so, imagine if the unthinkable suddenly manifest
one morning.
The heart beats too loud, too fast, it's blasting,
running in circles while breath were shortening
in disbelief, these hands were shaking,
leaving me in blank
of what I should do next.
I might blurted something stupid, but that is honesty
and if that made you giggle, then I am happy
to take you further to know this side of me
as I've decided not to loose you eventually
yes, it is troubling and overflowing
yet, I wouldn't call it 'problems' as it is a blessing
if it is scarcely
where did I find the strength and ability
to safeguard this sweetness, in all this intricacy
buoying that warmth wrapped in the softest silk
enclosed in my heart
protecting it with all I've got
protecting it, even from me.
